Monday, November 22, 2010

Look at Me


I've recently noticed a proliferation of these "In Loving Memory" car decals, generally in the rear window. Apparently, the owners of these cars have suffered a recent loss and are intent on letting everyone behind them know. Obviously death is a sad and sometimes tragic occurrence, but informing complete strangers in traffic strikes me as an odd way to mourn or remember a loved one. Isn't that what funerals and photo albums are for?

How did cars become mobile tombstones? I wonder who the first person was who said "Grandma's dead! I wish to commemorate that sweet woman's passing by plastering her name, birth and death dates on a surface that is essentially a target for bird feces."

Car decals of different types are all the rage. Take these god-forsaken things...
Who is the sadist who came up with this?

Why must I learn everything there is to know about you while I'm stopped behind you at a red light? Must I know that you have three kids and love Disney? Must I know that you "heart" your collie or that your kid is autistic? Do I need to know your alma mater or that there's a baby on board?

I don't care what sport your daughter plays or that you want to keep the Christ in Christmas. I don't care that you despise Ford vehicles so much that you need to display Calvin peeing on the brand name. I am not interested in knowing that you fish or hunt.

Why does your car now have to resemble your Facebook page?

Get a hold of yourselves, people. Your lives and preferences aren't all that important. The only people who need to know all of these things about you know them without looking at your car.

Fin.

6 comments:

  1. This started long ago with bumper stickers. The one that irritates me is the car with that small chrome fish symbol on an SUV parked in a handicapped space without the required handicap hang tag or visible handicap when the people in the auto jump out and sprint to the store door.

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  2. I'm guilty of having a Miskatonic University sticker on my car and a German shepherd magnet... so sue me!!!!!

    ;-)

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  3. I absolutely hate those "in loving memory" decals. Eventually the letters start to peel off and it doesn't spell anything anymore, and that's not how I'd choose to honor my loved ones.

    I have been anti any kind of sticker on my car ever since I bought it. I couldn't bear the thought of desecrating my car like that but I did get a sticker of the outline of Oregon with a green heart in the middle when I moved to Utah. Those Mormons need to know that I'm not, and never will be one of them.

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  4. Ok, so I was ranting and raving...the odd sticker here and there isn't such a bother...

    See now you've all gone and made me feel bad.

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  5. What if it wasn't grandma or grandpa? What if it was your son? Your only son and you missed him more than life itself? What if it made your day truly better to see a decal and to think of his face every morning?

    Stop being a selfish little brat who complains about stupid things and get a life. First world problems...

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  6. LOL first world problems. Thats not too hack.

    wish I had seen this sooner. problem is, you aren't seeing the decal. Everyone else BUT you is seeing the decal.

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